Some Days, I Swear, Time is Only an Illusion

Wasn’t it just 08:00 a couple of minutes ago?  Have I been on the job sites and in the e-mails and on the phone all day?

Well, at least I talked to seven recruiters today, talked to both my brother and mother, directly applied for four new jobs, and got some chores done.  And, I think in some sneaky way, one of those calls to a recruiter was a phone-screen.  I’m not sure, but I have suspicions.

I just need to train my cats to make lunch for me, so I don’t miss meals.  Yeah, I know, good luck with that one, Nate.

I’m going to stop telling people how long I’ve been unemployed.  I appreciate the concern, but there are just some special people out there that take it upon themselves to tell me exactly how to remedy it.  I’m not referring to the pointers, tricks, tips, advice, and offers of help that commenters on this blog or Facebook friends offer.  I’m talking about dang-near marching orders given to me by utter strangers.  (And I’m not being passive-aggressive here – you commenters have been very supportive and help keep me up and going.)

These self-appointed drill sergeants tell me to stop being lazy, to get my resume together, to go out there and collect applications and not take no for an answer.  As if I don’t know how to get a job, and especially the part about collecting applications.  As if that applies in the age of the Internet – you try applying in person somewhere, with such an attitude, and tell me how long it takes them to call security to escort you out.

I don’t think I’ll wait up for your answer.

I’m also tired of hearing how you’ve never been unemployed for longer than five days, or how you marathoned applications without sleep, food, or sufficient oxygen until you were hired.  I love hearing about your successes, that makes my path forward so much clearer.

Remind me to send your parents a thank you card, for ensuring you exist.

There are plenty of jobs out there, but there are also plenty of job-seekers out there.  It’s a buyer’s market, so-to-speak, so getting to a real, in-person interview and past phone-screenings is a huge step.

Well, my stomach is currently attacking my spine for nutrients, so I think I’ll go make something to eat and call it a short blog post.

Have fun, readers.


2 thoughts on “Some Days, I Swear, Time is Only an Illusion

  1. Maybe it’s time to start getting really creative with the resume. Remember that time we took a paid smoke break at the bank? You were getting paid to stand leaning against a wall where people could see you… Trenchcoat model. Or how about that time you gave that guy some change and told him not to spend it all in one place? Financial advisor… 

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