The Biggest Barrier to Blogging

Posted 2007 April 14 Saturday 20:06 Jabberings (4)

I keep sitting in front of this screen, looking at the blinking cursor, trying to make a blog post, trying to write something that will change life or allow for re-discovery of the self, or something else shattering.  I’ve been trying too hard.

I was reading about the biggest barrier to blogging is being stopped.  I’d link to it, but I didn’t bookmark the page and it was from one of those random “best links of the day” pages.  Whether it’s because of the tool that you blog with or something interrupts, it doesn’t matter.  It ends up that the post gets stopped and thus blogging is stopped.

I tried to blame work for keeping me busy, and that was partially true but really lame and stupid.  I tried to blame Serendipity, and that was also partially true but mostly misplaced.

So, what gives on my stoppage?  I must own up and say it was my fault, and after a hella lotta beer last night, I think I figured it out.  Whilst looking at three drafts, a couple of note-pad pre-posts, and the topics, it’s entirely been fear.

Fear of typing something stupid, or of giving voice to an an unpopular opinion, or getting feedback via comments that disagrees or challenges me.

I thought I had gotten past that years ago — I mean, fer cryin’ out loud I wear a trenchcoat all year long, swear like a sailor, and generally annoy people with humorous nonsense and psychobabble…  Why do I worry about others’ opinions?

It appears to be a cyclic thing.  The same way that life has it’s ups and downs in a cycle, disaster leads to adaptation leads to recovery leads to comfort leads to laziness leads to disaster leads to… 

You get the idea.

So, in a conscious effort to ignore my fear of the nameless, here goes:  I forgot to blog about this at the beginning of the month, with the new install and looking into WordPress’s guts…

I got my hair cut again.  Yep, back to collar-length.  No, the sides and front aren’t cut, just the length in the back.  I still tie it back, and it still looks about the same, but no freakin’ long pony-tail.

It’s enough change to make life a little different, but not so much that anything really changes.  Well, I don’t use as much shampoo anymore.  Oh, and my hair dries in under four hours.  Oh, and brushing isn’t as painful.  And my head is lighter…

So it’s different.  I like it.  I especially like how people became protective of my hair and seem hurt or annoyed with me for changing my appearance.  I’d be annoyed, but I can’t really.  They appreciate who I am and what I am to them, I can’t fault them for not wanting a change in that.

Having fun readers?   I am.  :twisted:  

Skåll!!!